Women's Wisdom

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Thoughts on the Pill

I'm on day 20.  I can feel the irritation and narkiness that comes with my pre menstrual phase building.  This the time of the month often brings about a rant, and today, what really grinds my gears (yes, that was a Family Guy reference) is all the talk about the contraceptive pill in the UK at the moment.

A news story came out today, in which an NHS report suggests that girls as young as 13 should be able to walk into a chemists and get the pill, without having to see a doctor http://uk.news.yahoo.com/over-counter-pill-girls-13-034326518.html.

Apparently, this already happens in some parts of London.  It is also currently possible to walk into a chemist and buy the morning after pill for around £25.  Some chemists were also talking about allowing women under 25 to gain free access to the morning after pill. 

...It follows a pilot scheme which found the number of women needing emergency contraception "dropped significantly" in the year following the introduction of over-the-counter access to the pill.

Well... duurrrrr.... what a surprise! 

Currently, teenage girls would need to speak to a doctor to get a prescription for the contraceptive pill, or go to a family planning clinic, where they would be seen by one of the qualified doctors there.  I'm not sure that parents have to be made aware of this or not, but at least the girl would have some proper advice given to her...  Blood pressure is taken, along with weight and other general questions and checks.  If you aren't grown up enough to ask your doc or go to a clinic, the you probably aren't grown up enough to be on the pill.
Allowing teenagers as young as 13, free access to the pill, with no medical guidance or advice is completely ridiculous.  I am so sick of the media and people banging on about the pill like it is a sugary sweet that magically stops you from getting pregnant. 

NEWS FLASH....
The contraceptive pill contains chemicals.  It contains synthetic forms of the hormones estrogen and progesterone (progestin).  They work by suppressing ovulation.  Some brands contain both forms (combined pill) and some just contain progestin (min-pill).  They don't work by magic.  They interrupt your natural rhythm, and stop your natural cycle.

Doctors and pharmaceutical companies will have you believe that the pill is THE cure for mood swings, it's the cure for acne, depression, for irregular periods and more... AND that all those things are abnormal and should be treated.

Hormones are created in response to signals from the brain.  Hormones are like a radio signal, and the receptors are the antenna.  When you take the pill, it over rides the radio signal.  It sends it's own signals to the receptors that stop ovulation.  The body's natural receptors then get used to this signal, and act accordingly.  But what happens with long term use?  or in young women bodies that are still forming and whose hormones are still settling down?

I know there ARE benefits to the pill...
 It has been shown to protect against cancer of the ovaries and the womb lining and pelvic inflammatory disease, a major cause of infertility in women, and (they claim) it can make periods more regular.  However, it is not recommended for women over 35 who smoke heavily, obese women, those with high blood pressure, a history of heart disease or blood clots and other illnesses, such as breast cancer.

I also know that a few ladies find it helps their PMDD, but the success rate is seriously hit and miss, and I would question if it is ever a good option for women who are sensitive to hormones.

My rant is really that all this talk about the pill being handed out to stop kids getting pregnant is only one part of the story.  What about the use of synthetic hormones in girls that are barely developed themselves?

So, 13 year old Rosie, who has only just started her period and whose hormones are still going crazy and haven't settled down yet, goes out to the chemists and get's the pill.  Her doctor doesn't know and nor does her mother.  She decides to go on it because she's heard it might stop the horrible spots she's been getting and she also really likes Jake and he really likes her and cos he already watches a ton of porn on the internet, she thinks he might want to have sex.  She is being responsible and doing the 'adult' thing in getting herself protected against pregnancy, but she hasn't talked to anyone other than her mates and the nice man at the chemists.  She can't tell her mum cos she would freak.  Rosie knows nothing of the effects the pill could have on her, neither does she understand what's in it and how it works...  Rosie and her mum don't talk about such things.  It's too embarrassing, and her mum would just think that she is a slut and is only going on it to sleep with boys....  Rosie has barely got used to her body having a cycle, her body has barely got used to the new hormones, then BAM... the pill enters her system and the cycle is gone.

Rosie is in control, she feels grown up and responsible.  After six months on the pill, Jake decides he wants to take the relationship further...  Rosie is hesitant but knows she can't get pregnant, so she decides the time is right.  She has some condoms in her purse too, which she knows help prevent catching STD's, so she asks Jake to wear one... He says there's no need, cos she's on the pill, and he hasn't done anything with anyone... reluctantly Rosie agrees.  She doesn't want to lose Jake or upset him....

Rosie and Jake have been together for a couple of years now.  They are 15 and have been sleeping together for a while.   Rosie's mum knows they are close, but doesn't know for sure if her daughter is having sex, and she tries to blank out those thoughts and ignore it.  It's too embarrassing.  She sort of assumes they aren't as Rosie has never asked about the pill or anything.  She puts Rosie's outbursts and mood swings down to her teenage hormones and just accepts that her daughter doesnt want to share anything with her.

Then, Rosie finds out she is pregnant.  She is 16 and about to do her GCSE's... HOW did that happen?  Maybe it was those few days last month when she forgot to take the pill... she took one late and thought it would be ok... or maybe was it because she was ill and on antibiotics for a week?  Rosie didn't know the pill can stop working of you take antibiotics.  Her mum is gonna go mad... The shame, the fear, she feels sick to her stomach.....

Maybe, the freedom of taking the pill could lead Rosie down the path of sex with more than just one person.. maybe she could end up with an STI, or get pregnant and not know who the father is.
What gets me with all of this, and it's a familiar story all over the UK, is that the communication between mothers and daughters is weak.  Mothers are not teaching their daughters what they need to know.  There is no communication, no passing on of advice.

Rather than try and throw a magic pill at every young girl in the hope of making the UK's teenage pregnancy rates look better, why are we not questioning WHY these young girls are having sex so young.  Why are we not looking at healing the relationships between mother and daughter?
Why is it that teenage girls have such low self esteem and think so little of themselves that they seek to have sex at such a young age?  Why are we not teaching young girls how to respect their bodies and themselves?  helping them to understand the changes and risks involved with sex and contraception?

No one really knows the long term effects the pill can have, or what it may do to a young body that is still forming.  I started taking the Pill at 13.  I was showing signs of PMDD but no-one knew that back then.  I also suffered from really bad acne and depression.  The pill was given to me to cure it all.. to make me better.  When I look back, I wonder if my mood swings at 13 were just perfectly normal.. extreme yes, but I have since found out I am sensitive to hormones, but what if taking the pill at 13 actually caused my PMDD.. what if it messed my system up for the rest of my life?

What I do know for sure is when I came off the pill aged 20 (that's 7 years of synthetic hormones and no ovulation) is that I felt completely different.  The pill had never stopped the mood swings, in fact, by the time I stopped taking it I was getting some pretty extreme episodes.  I became pregnant a few months after stopping the pill.  It was a planned pregnancy as I had just got married.  I experienced severe depression during my pregnancy and post natal depression afterwards.  PMDD came back with a vengence along with my periods and motherhood was very difficult.

My body didn't know what a natural cycle was.  It had only had 6-7 cycles before I got pregnant.  I truly believe that our natural cycles prepare us for being pregnant.  Without intervention, it is possible to become in tune with your menstrual cycle.  You lean how you are at different times of the month.. you can FEEL the changes.  Each cycle is a chance to learn something new about yourself.  It's an inner tool, that we simply throw away when we start taking the pill.

By encouraging young girls to take the pill as soon as they start their period, or for other ailments that could be helped by other methods, we are stealing our daughters ability to learn from their cycle.  We are taking away that inbuilt natural blessing of being a woman...

We need to heal the mother daughter relationship.  Many of the current generation of mothers have grown up on the pill, and don't ever question it.  If it was good for them, then it's good for their kids....  I urge you to think twice about ever putting this drug in your body, or allowing your daughter to.  There are other ways of preventing pregnancy, there are other ways of dealing with mood swings, acne and depression.

Here is a great link to a piece by Dr Erika Schwartz.  She has written a few books on hormones and the menstrual cycle, and I found her response to a worried mothers question a really good read.  I would recommend you take a look.

And as for the increased risk of sexually transmitted diseases and infections... or how the pharmaceutical companies make us believe in whatever will make the most profit for them...
well, those rants are for another day....

A bit about me...

I am an artist with a mood disorder. I suffer from PMDD, Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder.

I've had it since my hormones kicked in during my early teens, but it wasnt diagnosed until I was 27. Up till that point, It was assumed I was depressed. I began to notice cycles, and correlations between my moodiness and my menstrual cycle, and began researching mood disorders. I discovered PMDD and realised that my symptoms checked all the boxes. I went to my doctor, who wouldnt entertain such a thing, so, I found another doctor. By this time I was in full blown severe mood swings, with anxiety attacks and agrophobia, something that I had last experienced during my first pregnancy. Untill I knew that there was a recognised condition, I truly believed I was going insane, or had gone insane. I couldnt cope with being a mother, having a child, work, life.. there have been many times when I have been close to leaving this world forever. From the age of 16, I had been having mental heath assessments, counselling, sessions with psychiatrists, and everyone has tried to get me to take anti-depressants. I always said no, believing there were better ways to survive, but in my years of suffering, I have realised that the only way to survive without medication is having an amazing support system of friends, family, support groups... and even then, it will be very difficult. The chemical imbalances in my body, lead to imbalances in my brain, which in turn, create crazy thoughts, depression, lethargy, agrophobia, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, negativity and a general sense of confusion and frustration.
I have taken various anti-depressants over the years, but my dose had increased and with such a scatty head, remembering to take them was half the problem. I came off Fluoxetine 2 months ago. A choice
made because my life has dramatically changed, I am happier, I have been strong through a whole heap of bad times, I have a roof over my head, two beautiful children and a man who loves me. If there isn't a better time to come off the meds, I dont know when is.

Having said that, the moods are still swinging like a pendulum, and life is very difficult at times. The ups are great, the downs can be very bad, and trying to go with the flow and accept this is a very hard task.
I have have developed ways of coping, but still struggle month to month, day to day. I am in unknown territory now, no meds, but a happier life... Painting, creating and cooking are all things that help, but
sometimes the demons are so hard to shake off that even the doing the things I love cant drag me back from the depths.

I have always been interested in the alternative and esoteric. I never felt like I have fitted in, always the outsider, always the one left behind, but I became devoted to the spritual from a young age. From
faeries in the garden, making potions from plants, to asking for Tarot cards on my 13th Birthday and reading books on ghosts and spirits. Since leaving school I have studied Performing Arts, Art, Graphic Design, Photography, Aromatherapy, Massage and Tarot Therapy. I have self taught myself about Crystals, Astrology, Sacred Geometry, Art Therapy and Mandalas and have been practicing Yoga and Meditation on and off for 10 years. Many of these things have helped me survive over the years. Learning new things excites me, and there are still so many things I want to know about. Astrology is a huge interest of mine, and I still plan to study to Professional level. Normal life is difficult for me. I have such severe fluctuations in my mood, things get cancelled at the last minute, even when I'm in an 'up' phase, anxieties can rear up, and some situations are just a no-no for me. I live in the countryside where life is slower and much more simple. I enjoy my occasional flirts with towns and citys, shopping and nights out, but I feel much safer at home, surrounded by places and people I know.

My Art, tends to arrive in bursts. Like cosmically alligned planets, I have to be 'in the mood' to draw, plus have enough time away from the children to get something started. Once something is started, I usually have to leave it during it's creation, then come back when the next alignment happens! but the painting/drawing never leaves my head until it's finished. I am spontaneous in my work and usually, with very little planning I will attack a canvas. Mandalas take more consideration before I start, but having geometry to work with, gives me somewhere to start. I find Mandalas very relaxing to draw. I went through a furious Mandala creating stage, which has slowed up now in favour of painting, but I still occasionally go back to my pencils and dive into a circle.

I face opposites and balance in so many aspects of my life. I am a Pisces Sun, with a Virgo Moon, so not only are the Sun and Moon in opposition naturally, so too are Pisces and Virgo at opposite sides of the zodiac wheel. Pisces, itself is the sign of two fish swimming in opposite directions. I have two sides to my personality when the moods hit, as any woman with PMDD will describe. Jekyll and Hyde come to mind. To top it off, my Rising sign is Gemini, the sign of the Twins. In Numerology my life path number is 33/6.

I have followed a pagan path all my life, but began reading and studying around the age of 18. I worked as a solitary witch for many years, and joined a coven in my early twenties. I still follow a pagan path, although my witchcraft is reserved for my own personal use, and is something very quietly personal to me. I am a Witch, (if you class a witch as someone who observes the seasons, honours the God and Goddess, and uses knowledge of nature to initiate change and healing for the good of all). I used to wear the symbol, I used to hold rituals and cast spells... but the need for such public and outward displays of my spirituality no longer interests me.

We barely remember who or what came before this precious moment, We are choosing to be here right now. Hold on, stay inside, This holy reality, this holy experience. Choosing to be here in This body. This
body holding me. Be my reminder here that I am not alone in This body, this body holding me, feeling eternal. All this pain is an illusion. Alive, I. Parabola by TOOL

Every comment and piece of feedback left for me, helps me keep on creating, it encourages me, it inspires me. Thankyou to everyone who spends time looking at my creations and reading my words...

10 mins

Everyday I will write for at least 10 mins in one of my journals. I have 3. One with my deviantART page, one on my website, and here. I cross post between the other two quite often, but the stuff I post here usually stays here. At least that may mean that I keep this journal up, as I have been appalling at keeping it up. It's been about 2 months since I wrote, loads of stuff has happened... I got a job, left a job, Luke has a new job, we've sold our van... lots of earthly things, but my head is still no where near ready for the coming phases in my life.

I had intended to write something this evening, one of the many ideas or musings that come into my head, but just as I'd stuck Delicate sound of Thunder on iTunes and opened a fresh post, my baby cried out. Running up to see her, I was worried she may have fallen out of bed. She has just moved into a toddler bed from a cot. Alas, she was still in bed, covered, and I mean covered in sick.

I am not good at dealing with vomit. There's not too many things in the world that I cant deal with, but vomit is one of them. It comes from being really ill with travel sickness as a child, and then as a teenager/young adult, regularly hanging my head over the toilet bowl after crazy drinking sessions. In both my pregnancies the sickness has lasted for 4-5 months, in fact, the last time saw me in hospital as I couldnt even keep down water.

I'm assuming Fae has a tummy bug, as this happened last night too. Luke dealt with it last night while I slept, but this eve, I'm up, he's in bed. I could have woke him... and nearly did, but when it comes down to it, I'm her mum, and I have to be able to sort these things.

She sat in her bed, half asleep, did what she was told, quiet as a mouse. I ran her a warm bubbly bath and sat her in it while I went back to clean up the mess and change her bed covers. Holding my breath, and just taking time to sort it without freaking, I changed the covers, shook off the chunks into the toilet, and stuffed everything in the washing machine. Washed her hair, brushed her teeth, and put fresh jammies on, she did it all with no fuss, no bother and with the occasional beeming smile. A short story later, and she snuggled down to sleep.

I return back to the computer.. Dogs of War is playing, and I've missed the whole album!

The things you have to do when you're a mum!